Post Memorial Day! Cut up a watermelon. Grab your sunscreen and…a nice warm layer. Air conditioning season hath wrought its hell once more. The scourge of artificially chilled air dates back to 1902, when an engineer in Brooklyn began experimenting with the laws of humidity to create a device that would make it just crisp enough to induce goosebumps at work. Air conditioning is inarguably bad for the environment. It creates greenhouse gases and eats up energy. While we understand the need to pump movie theaters or Vegas casinos full of large-scale canned air on a hot summer day, can we all agree that air conditioning is too much? It’s everywhere, it’s over the top, and it’s making it painful to walk down some grocery store aisles.
Though the United States is a country with relatively new buildings, we use air conditioning more than most of the rest of the world (only China tops us). This must be said:excessive air conditioning is an affront to women. The aggressive blast of your average corporate HVAC has been shown to make work a less comfortable place for female employees. This same study found that women have both physiological and “clothing reasons” to run colder than men. No one who’s ever worn a dress so thin that only thread and a prayer protect you from the elements would set the thermostat at 68 degrees. While coldness clearly runs on a spectrum, science does indicate that people generally overestimate how uncomfortable they will be when warm. Surely, we can all chill on the air conditioning and use it a little more sparingly. There are more fun ways to cool off than A/C. Wearing a pair of cutoffs while drinking a frosty beverage seems a lot more fun than succumbing to exposure in your spouse’s car.
Up in Smoke
Catching a buzz during air travel is not uncommon, and the general rule of thumb is to always stay lucid enough to be allowed on the flight. And despite getting reprimanded for lighting up a cigarette on a JSX flight this past week, Britney Jean Spears stuck that landing like it was choreography and got to her destination. The only issue was that the authorities met her and issued an official warning when the pop star landed in Los Angeles.
Spears was in a conservatorship for 13 years, and before 2021, pretty much every aspect of her life was controlled for over a decade. That would give most people a skewed relationship with rules and authority. But prior to her conservatorship in 2008, smoking on flights had only been banned on commercial flights in the U.S. for eight years. This was also at the height of her career when she was probably flying on private planes where she could alternate cigarettes, cheetos, and a frappuccino, as God and nature intended.
Cut to her May 22nd JSX flight, a semi-private jet coming from Mexico, after a few vodkas—a literal cocktail for confusion. Whether or not it was her first time drinking vodka, as she claimed in her Instagram post about the incident, anyone who’s had two consecutive martinis can see why it would make you feel “so clear and smart !!!” We can also empathize with wanting a cigarette.
A post shared by @britneyspears
It may be too far of a leap to believe that Spears did not know that smoking was prohibited, but it’s not hard to wrap our brains around bending the rules on a flight after a few drinks. Human beings have a well-documented record of behaving in batshit ways when flying the unfriendly skies, and celebrities are often an extreme version of this.
Remember when Alec Baldwin got booted from an American Airlines flight because he would not stop playing Word with Friends? The biggest difference is that Spears seemed to remain her sweet self throughout the entire debacle and apologized to anyone she may have offended. She was so devoid of aggression that she initially thought the officials were there to support her. Perhaps that is why she reached her intended destination, unlike Alec or other flight disrupters who’ve been rerouted midair.
Sure, smoking has not been allowed on airlines outside of private planes for decades. However, since Trump’s efforts to shrink the federal workforce have led to a shortage of air traffic controllers, flying has become so terrifying that flight attendants should hand out Zyn pouches before takeoff. People are understandably more concerned about getting to their destination safely than about whether someone is stress-vaping in the lavatory.
Until consumer confidence is partially restored, is it too much to ask for a child-free, nicotine-friendly flight option? A girl can dream. Well, may not a girl, but not yet a woman.
This Ain’t Texas
Freedom ain’t free, especially in Texas. The state is in the final stages of banning all THC products. Senate Bill 3 would make the consumption of any hemp products, including the synthetic cannabinoid delta-8, punishable by up to a $500 fine. Repeat offenders could also receive jail time.
Non-psychoactive cannabinoids such as CBD or CBG will remain legal. However, given what we know about the entourage effect, banning low doses of THC might limit the efficacy of those products. Approved medical patients will still have access to low-THC products, but with only three licensed medical dispensaries in the entire state, legal weed access remains extremely limited for Texans.
At this point, Joe Rogan cannot even save the Lone Star stoners. Although Governor Greg Abbott could veto the legislation, that possibility seems unlikely given that Republican Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick has spearheaded the ban. Some Redditors speculate that once the state seizes dispensaries, THC will be legalized for the monetary benefit of the government, rather than for small business owners. But given the conservative cultural climate of the state, that could be high-minded, wishful thinking. Regardless, the new law will keep Austin weird, but not in a fun way.
Texas is about to ban THC products. Here’s what you need to know.
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